And fuck you.
1st) Thank you. Thank you so much. Between the two of you, you are turning me, a 27-year-old woman who deals with multiple mental issues into a bona-fide adult.
2nd) Fuck you - THIS IS HARD! But I mean that “fuck you” in the most loving way possible.
Between the two of you, you have taught me:
- That I am not alone
- That is Is Going To Be Alright
- That I don’t have to get everything right - progress, not perfection, right?
- How to make my depression AND anxiety a little more manageable (one step, one MINUTE at a time - but I. Can. Do. This.)
- That it won’t kill me to put dishes in the dishwasher, or empty said dishwasher, or wash the dishes in the sink! That, in fact, it will only take me about 5 minutes to do each of the listed actions!
- That it won’t kill me to clean my bathroom counter
- That it’s fun to see dirty things get clean
- The amazingness that is a Magic Eraser, that is vinegar, and that is baking soda
- My credit score (omgah this one is scary)
- That Mint.com is a wonderful thing
- That it’s a good idea to put clothes away as soon as the dryer is done
- That I really CAN do almost anything for 15-20 minutes at a time
- That I am, in fact, mostly an adult.
So, from the adult-brain me, from my parents, from my employer, loan holders, boyfriend, and everyone who wants me to be a healthy mostly-adult: thank you
And from the irresponsible child-brain stuck in depression and anxiety: fuck you. You’re making this part of my brain smaller and far less effective than it has been in the past.
And for that I love you.