Look, I only wanted to get some efficient cleaning done, I didn’t ask my soul to be sacrificed to the devil or some shit!!!
Well yeah, I don’t have definitive proof of the whole soul sacrifice bit, of course, but this can’t be anything short of the devil’s work, no way in fuck-all hell.
Try the magic eraser, they said. It’ll be innocent fun, they said. Liars! There’s no such thing as as innocent cleaning fun with just a ‘sponge and some water’, man! That’s fucking unreal!
I mean look at this,
It’s evil! Sorcery! Do you expect me to believe that for 3 dollars, I could get 6 magic erasers and face no consequences? Seriously? Not for a second would I believe you now!
Snow white floors are not worth the payment I am sure to be forced to pay!
Damn you all, I will see you all in hell, where a section for Magic Eraser users is surely reserved.